Feelings for someone, do I have it?

I thought...
... I had feelings for him.
... I did certain things especially for him.
... I felt happy when he does those funny things.
... I had the heart-thumping sensation whenever I see him.

All of e above, I have... but somehow it just doesn't seem to connect properly.

Maybe I'm tired.

Maybe I've the phobia of trying.

Maybe I don't wish to lose a friend.

Maybe I've retreated 'coz things will not work out for both of us.

Maybe I don't even know what my heart is feeling 'coz it's so messed up.

There's 2 phrases that I find weird:
1. 'Time will tell..'
2. 'Let nature take its course..'

What will it tell? I've never believed in letting nature take its course 'coz we are the ones who choose what we want to do in life and who we want to be with. I've always lived by that theory until today. Somehow, I just feel maybe it's time to let these 2 phrases prove my theory wrong.. I guess I don't have that energy to do anything more at this point of time..

We'll see.. We'll see..